shame of me :'(

hello , assalamualaikum ,

firstly , i mostly feel shame of myself base on what i had done today ,

i feel like just had put the dirt on my face and go  to see the people out there , 

and they laughed to me , yeah , i feel like that , it was my bad , i mean i'm trying to accept that we are not mean together but i can't , i just had sacrifice everything for him , then i can't trust him , i always feel that he cheated on me out there then i'm suddenly get angry for no reasons , when that terrible thing happen , i just asked him to gave up me all the thing i had gave him with no thinking properly , i'm regret after all the things already happen and i'm crying with non stop then i am realise that i love him so much ,